I have known you since I could understand things. When you probably were in 4th-5th standard. But then you were a kid, you cannot be questioned for your decisions then. Howsoever it was, I know you cherish it and that is great.
But lets prune into details since your 10th class, when you were about to make a career choice. How you fooled everyone with conviction that yes, you are a bright science student who will do very well in non-medical. While deep down you knew that you liked social studies more. You could have done great in Arts. But you convinced yourself into cattle herd and that's how your life changed, into an all new direction.
But you could not fool yourself for long. You know that you took this career decision out of peer-pressure. After all, all toppers used to go for science stream. Arts and commerce happens to be for lesser bright minds. How foolish you were then. It cost you atleast 9 years of your life. No doubt you got admission in a good college, then a decent job that made everyone so proud. But there need to have a stop. To just think if it was all right? You were struggling between your interests and your obligations. The constant urge to prove yourself everytime, without enjoying the damn process. How badly you wanted to run out of your job but still was happy with the financial independence it came along with.
Its only when you embraced IAS studies by heart that you realized how much you loved studying Economy, polity, history and everything. It was then you could comprehend how bad physics was for you. Though the realization came, but it came very late. How more productive last 9 years could have been had it been another career lane.
Now what has happened has happened. You were not entirely to be blamed. The peer pressure was actually huge at that time. It overpowered your interests. A 10th class student cannot be expected to understand what lies ahead. I just wish you had better access to information then. Your decisions could have been wiser. But whatever happens, it happens for the best.
The rest of your life has got an important lesson to be followed. Its not always important to make everyone happy and proud of you. Things will automatically fall in place when you are happy and proud of yourself. Your mind and heart should know that you are doing it right. Rest you can leave upon karma. Its very important that we give ourselves equal importance. As I always say, do what your heart says. Make mistakes but own your mistakes. Don't let prejudices overpower you. Learn, earn and proceed. Dance, sing, play, travel, read or write. Just do it for yourself. You will know how beautifully your life will turn out to be..
Have a great life ahead. 🙂
