Out Of The Frying Pan
Maybe they'd stop taking pictures of you when you're looking so busted when you stop being so busted.
In other words you stay away from people like me. I get it.
Hey bitch it isn't a choice it's just really bad luck.
It is pretty sketchy for a teen to have plastic surgery except for certain circumstances. A fifteen year old doesn't need a boob job.
Why didn't she just go to IHOP herself? Call an Uber bitch. Do they even have sandwiches there? That place just makes me think pancakes after all it is in the name.
Well that makes everything just hunky dory with your new cellphone.
Poor you. I feel horrible that you weren't able to do as much shopping as your normally do while your friend was AWOL.
Screw being famous I'd rather have money and not have to hunt for the cheapest price and be able to walk into a store and just buy something without even looking at the price tag.
That is handy having casting approval on who is going to be your best friend. Who wants an actual best friend when you can pretend to have one and get a big payday.
Damn must be nice to have so much bling and money that you don't even notice when a diamond earring goes missing. I have a missing hoop. I think there's a gnome that steals earrings and or earring backs along with another gnome that's probably a cousin that steals socks from the dryer.
Chapter 7
The Legend Of Simone Westlake
Okay Simone isn't an Einstein which isn't shocking but damn it now I want a bagel.
Whoa that's impressive in a completely terrifying way for a not quite four year old to kill a tutor.
So Simone talks like a Kardashian. Yes I'll confess I originally thought the name was a type of alien on Star Trek.
What in the fuck is fletch? Is she getting the word fetch wrong?
Oh sure I was wearing makeup in kindergarten.
Chapter 8
The Art Of The Deal
They have pantyhose at Costco? Who knew this book would teach me something?
What's the difference between a fun bun and an unfun bun?
We are going to make future? Ookay.
Sounds like she's Tammy Faye when it comes to makeup. There's a reason there's a saying called less is more otherwise you look like a clown. Okay I added that last part.
Who doesn't want helmet hair? I aspire to that every day but I can never quite pull it off.
Save the bristling for later when the cameras aren't around.
Face palm.
Oh really Simone. So your cat isn't wearing nail polish or your dog isn't wearing eye shadow?
Face palm. Are you kidding me?
Face palm, Are you serious?
Hello Kitty is my queen. She's a goddess. Also she's queen when it comes to cosplay. Oops where was I? Oh yes I'm reading a book.
Really? You're going to film in the bathroom. Sounds pretty invasive to me. Can't a girl get a little privacy? I guess someone won't be doing any snorting or injecting or whatever she was planning on doing.
Note to self: Always check the fine print to make sure bathroom time remains private time.
