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Come on; we know it’s the worst age; it’s the one where they turn from babies to hyenas, that of pimples, of the voice that changes, and of the insolent teenager. The video game industry knows this well too. When they switch from Super Mario to Fifa, everything changes. It’s like going from dolls to lip gloss, from toy cars to bicycles, from role-play to online role play. For this, dear parents who move awkwardly like astronauts in these digital things, you must arm yourself with holy patience because no one, not even video game producers, will be able to help you. So here are eight rules for not succumbing to the hormonal impulses of your little-no-kids.

1) Don’t insist. If gifting Super Mario becomes “Mom was Princess Peach quick to Bowser? Do you understand? I have to save her!!!! I spent my grandma’s money on the new Super Mario.” Then there’s no point in giving him the latest Call of Duty. Your son has fun with the plumber in red dungarees. Know that even the squat Italian also jumps like forty-year-olds. So there is nothing wrong with your child.

2) Clash Royale like Hearthstone should be monitored. For some kids (and others), it’s like breathing glued into bags. For those who don’t know them, it is an app on mobile phones and at the same time a perfect strategic game, perfect in its dynamics and its gameplay. Also, perfect because it’s free (you only pay to level up), games don’t last long, and there are always online players ready to challenge you. If your child exhibits the traits of an addictive personality, they risk spending hours on it. This is why it must be monitored.

3) Minecraft should not be monitored. It’s like Lego. How do you take it if you see your child concentrating on bricks? However, if you discover him awake at two in the morning intent on feverishly building very disturbing houses or making human sacrifices or large-scale genocides with specific animal or zombie species, then perhaps it is appropriate to consult someone

4) Sooner or later in your life a friend of his will arrive and ask the terrible question: “But how don’t you have Fifa? Don’t you have the best football game in the world?”. When this happens, and this happens sooner or later, even in the best families, you react without thinking and pretend to be ill. But be careful: no one should be suspicious of you, not even your son. The risk otherwise is to watch hours and hours of busy televisions for your child’s online games with his damned companions.

5) The shooters. Yeah, the shooters (sigh). They discover them between the ages of ten and twelve. They will be asking for them from the age of eight. And, if you are good, you will give in at the age of 15. They are games where you go for a walk with a pistol, a submachine gun or a bazooka in your hand and, as the words say, you literally shoot everything. Pacifists have no room in this discussion. You know the children who pew-pew with their finger guns. Well, this is a million times better. And then there is a new sociality that passes from online games (you play the same game simultaneously but each at home talking to the others with microphones and headphones).

6) YouTubers and Twitch gamers. Also, in this case, the phenomenon must be accepted, and that’s it. Your child will start following characters who laugh out loud while playing video games. Characters you wouldn’t want to let in through your front door. Characters that you do not understand and will never understand and like magnets nail your children to the screen. If you are over forty, it is like expecting to follow a B movie that is not funny and wanting to find it funny. You can divide them into two categories. The streamers who make money streaming video games (Yes, that is a thing) and the YouTubers who explain how to dominate a game, the tricks, and how to win.

7) Football Manager, Farming Simulator, and more. And if you discover your child attached to a computer doing strange things like organizing a farm or choosing what to say to his soccer team at half-time for a match, it means that something has changed. He moved on to managerial games. These are games where work environments, economic systems, or ecosystems are simulated. You are called to make choices and understand the consequences of your actions. They are less immediate, more reflective, and no less fun video games

8) If one day you walk into your kid’s room and see a credit card in one hand and the mouse in the other. Path of Exile opens in one computer tab and a Google search for path of exile currency prices in another tab. Then you have walked into some dark stuff. If you are not already familiar with it, we are talking about microtransactions or, in gaming lingo, pay to win gaming. This is where your kid spends his not-so hard-earned pocket money buying virtual items which have no real-world value. God forbid if you see this happening, then I have only one piece of advice for you. Take away his computer for good. In fact, don’t stop there; make him say goodbye to all his digital gadgets.

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