The blog completed 11 years on Friday and honestly, I’ve stopped keep track of celebrations or anniversary and hits for that matter while a random check saw this congratulatory message popping on WordPress. 2007 was the year this blog was created during the Monsoon and been an Indian blog that has conserved its ethos over time. I’ve moved countries during the past decade but the blog is still what it is, conserving its Indian charm and identity.
More than a decade of writing and remember one of the first posts, if not the first, was about Mumbai, the city I was living in, amateurish film reviews and sobbing stories of my break-up, one the reasons that pushed me to move out. Let’s move on and flip the pages buried in the past. Pretty much like last month when the birthday was celebrated and honestly speaking, such moments have stopped making sense to me where I am on an alien space. It’s therapeutic to remove all those birthday notification on FB and Linkedin for the three years that gave serenity and mental peace. At some point, find it overbearing to read so much of messages and decided one day to tune off. Better to keep it among closed friends for they are the ones who wouldn’t miss to wish me. I like to keep such things personal and not wanting the entire world to know, not even distant relatives or neighbors. I have always been like that and even during college times, very few close friends knew about the day.
There is M who is a very close friend from college who makes a point every year to wish me Happy birthday and did share with some close college friends on WhatsApp who forgot but not beyond that. I think birthdays have become like New Year resolutions, where we make vows, forget the year that flitted past us or setting new targets to achieve. Nothing of that sort happens with me. I am learning to take one thing at a time and perhaps one achievable thing is to be more regular jotting in the personal diary, striving to be more composed and happy with myself, flushing out negative thoughts. Over time, I have been able to declutter negativity but there is still a little bit in me. See, I am not completely cured of it or anxiety that keeps plaguing me. But, then, I am a work-in-progress.
Writing took a toll during the past month. I’ve struggled in penning a fiction story for a friend since three months and finally almost done in weaving the entire story in episodes. The lack of creative ideas, irregular blog posts and the novel I am trying to do have been lost in translation. More practice is needed to hone my skills and sit in concentration mode to churn out ideas, translating them on paper. The worst is to edit the end product to make it clean and a lost battle. Reason why I mentioned on the need to take one thing at a time and stop dabbling with so many things on a single day. It can get frustrating but there is no dearth of solution if we want to.
Ciao
V
