No! This isn’t one of those sloppy, attention seeking rants about “Life” and how you got to make it big and cheerful. This one’s a result of me thinking, a lot. It is not about making it larger than life. It is about taking it slow and easy because people are suffering. I don’t want you to think a lot about this and go change the things you feel is wrong. This, on the contrary, is about not bothering for a while and just letting it go.
So as I said, I have been thinking a lot. I have been thinking of the past and what could have been done better. Would it have been possible for me to just undo them had I a little knowledge of the situation like I do now? Was I correct in not doing what I should have? But now that I come to think of it, I feel it has not changed me a bit. Not even my mistakes and failures could change how I act around my problems. I surely cannot blame anyone for that, can I? So I just close my eyes every once in a while and try to exhale all this out of my brain.
I have been thinking about my folks. Yes, my folks back at home who have never had to part with me for more than a fortnight and all of a sudden, it has been 4 months and they have not seen as much as a glimpse of me. I also think about the girl who left and flew all the way to a place where there is nobody but me who she knows and all this just to be with me, despite being constantly ill and having a tumour in her head.
We have all been suffering for one reason or the other and despite of the fact that we can do nothing to change in the present, we have pin our hopes on the future for this to get better. Have not all of us done the same? We all do that, right? So why not just relax a little? Why cannot we stop being desperate, greedy, ambitious and most of all, scared? Why not just take a day off and do nothing? That won’t hurt anyone for sure.
Why I write all this is because we have all delved into such great dept of desperation that coming out of it will probably take us another life time. I don’t give a damn if human race is the most advanced and intelligent species on this godforsaken planet. I don’t care if I was born out of love or nature or biology. I definitely do not have any religion or God above my head or in the sky. But what I do care about is the fact that I am here. I have come to life and I have got to live on this same godforsaken planet that I share with billions of other people and the “nature”. Why can’t I just live it not being bothered about how I am going to end up in the future when I surely have no idea where the fuck am I going to end up tomorrow? Why can’t we not just relax a little, slow down and look around. Look what civilization has done to us. We are in shambles and it is just going down with each passing minute.
No, this is not about world peace. This surely and definitely is about my peace. I want it back. I don’t want to bother anyone. I just want to live and not drag myself in survival.
You live only once. And my message is loud and clear – Live and let me live.
