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In my last post, I spoke about how feminism did not exist as a concept for me while growing up. Thanks to my chauvinistic father and uncles, I thought that the women are expected to worship their husbands and do all the chores at home while the men lazed in front of the TV and expected their wives to answer to the snap of their fingers. Being the man of the house meant too much to them that they were expected to be put on a pedestal and looked up to. Many women had the same thoughts too and this became a norm without anyone making a big deal out of it. While feminism as a concept is making waves now, some women who claim to be feminists themselves are getting it all wrong. Today we'll look at the other side, where women expect men to treat them like equals in all the wrong ways possible.
It is no hidden fact that I have a certain amount of hatred for housewives. I have been very vocal about it and have received my share of flak for it too. But, I stand by my thoughts. Before you start to revolt, let me make myself clear. I do not hate all housewives. There are wives who stay at home and maintain a very good environment at home. They cook piping hot food for every meal, keep their house spick and span, manage the bills, keep the family together and are on top of everything when it comes to the house. Such women, I call genius home makers. I bow down to such women and think that they need to be given equal rights as that of the men who are the bread winners here. Such women have a full time job at home and they do an excellent job. They do not while away their time watching TV or on the phone. They are proud of their home making skills and deserve to be so. This is what a housewife or a homemaker should be like. They respect the men for the work they do and they demand respect for the work they do at home too. Such women are true feminists.
Other women who stay at home and cook one meal a day and spend the rest of the day watching TV and on the phone, do not qualify as homemakers. Such women think that it is the duty of the man of the house to take care of them for the rest of their life. The man is expected to pay for all her whims and fancies and then adjust with whatever she has cooked. Even if it is the same meal for two days in a row, he is expected to be quiet. Such women have no clue about the groceries at home and when they run out of a condiment, a call is made to the husband asking him to come home and give her the money to purchase it. These women think that just because they stay at home, they are expected to lead a luxurious life mainly because they think that it is the duty of the man to earn and for her to spend. They don't keep tracks of the bills to be paid, because come on, when they do not earn what is the need to? Once a large quantity of a meal is prepared, it is stuffed in the fridge for the week. Such women have maids to clean the house and other chores and yet they do nothing for themselves. Why, some of them do not even have a hobby! And yet, this is what they think feminism is. I have no respect for women like these. I also doubt if they have some respect for themselves.
While this is one end of the spectrum, at the other end are those working women who make a big fat salary for themselves, but still think that it is the duty of their husbands to take care of them. These women have a well paying job, but they save their salary for God knows what. They shop with their husband's cards and take much pride in doing so. Even grocery shopping is to be done with the husband's money. Since these are working women, they have a maid, a cook and other help at homes. All these people are paid by the husband and the woman thinks that that is how it is expected to be. And then she goes on to call herself a feminist. She's financially independent after all.
Women need to understand that feminism is about equality and not about having things done your way. If your husband is the sole earning member, then you can be an equal by running the house seamlessly. Still better, you can do more and save some of the money by smart shopping and planning. While a man is at work, the flour getting over at home should be the least of his headaches. For a housewife, the house is the office. You need to know what is present at home and what is needed and when. Be smart enough to plan ahead and not trouble the man during the last minute. Some wives even depend on their husbands to ferry them from one place to another. Like that is only supposed to be a man thing! Working women need to assist their husbands in the expenses at home. While the incomes may not always be equal, you can handle at-least a thing or two. If one takes care of the rent, the other can pay some bills. It takes two to run a house, irrespective of how many of them are earning. Women need to understand that it is not the duty of a man to look after them for the rest of their lives. It is all about co-existing and making a world of their own together. This is what feminism is all about.
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One of the most important things that women need to do is to stop glorifying their men for every small chore they do. I've seen women go bat-shit crazy on social media when their husbands make them a cup of tea or cook a random meal. Hundreds of photographs are posted and the man is celebrated like he's just won himself the next master chef title. This is not necessary at all. Do you think men do the same for every meal you cook? It is not a big deal and it doesn't matter who cooks at home as long as there is food on the table. Women need to stop portraying their men as something great when this happens. Having your husband cook a meal doesn't make you a feminist. Thinking it is not a big deal when he makes it, does.
A lot of people have to tweak their idea of feminism to get it right and for it to work. Most importantly, women.
This post is a part of the powerful series #FeministMondays on Naba's blog. On the second Monday of every month there would be a post on feminism. You can be a part of it too. Write an impactful post with the hashtag #FeministMondays and link it back to Naba's blog.
Original link
In my last post, I spoke about how feminism did not exist as a concept for me while growing up. Thanks to my chauvinistic father and uncles, I thought that the women are expected to worship their husbands and do all the chores at home while the men lazed in front of the TV and expected their wives to answer to the snap of their fingers. Being the man of the house meant too much to them that they were expected to be put on a pedestal and looked up to. Many women had the same thoughts too and this became a norm without anyone making a big deal out of it. While feminism as a concept is making waves now, some women who claim to be feminists themselves are getting it all wrong. Today we'll look at the other side, where women expect men to treat them like equals in all the wrong ways possible.
It is no hidden fact that I have a certain amount of hatred for housewives. I have been very vocal about it and have received my share of flak for it too. But, I stand by my thoughts. Before you start to revolt, let me make myself clear. I do not hate all housewives. There are wives who stay at home and maintain a very good environment at home. They cook piping hot food for every meal, keep their house spick and span, manage the bills, keep the family together and are on top of everything when it comes to the house. Such women, I call genius home makers. I bow down to such women and think that they need to be given equal rights as that of the men who are the bread winners here. Such women have a full time job at home and they do an excellent job. They do not while away their time watching TV or on the phone. They are proud of their home making skills and deserve to be so. This is what a housewife or a homemaker should be like. They respect the men for the work they do and they demand respect for the work they do at home too. Such women are true feminists.
Other women who stay at home and cook one meal a day and spend the rest of the day watching TV and on the phone, do not qualify as homemakers. Such women think that it is the duty of the man of the house to take care of them for the rest of their life. The man is expected to pay for all her whims and fancies and then adjust with whatever she has cooked. Even if it is the same meal for two days in a row, he is expected to be quiet. Such women have no clue about the groceries at home and when they run out of a condiment, a call is made to the husband asking him to come home and give her the money to purchase it. These women think that just because they stay at home, they are expected to lead a luxurious life mainly because they think that it is the duty of the man to earn and for her to spend. They don't keep tracks of the bills to be paid, because come on, when they do not earn what is the need to? Once a large quantity of a meal is prepared, it is stuffed in the fridge for the week. Such women have maids to clean the house and other chores and yet they do nothing for themselves. Why, some of them do not even have a hobby! And yet, this is what they think feminism is. I have no respect for women like these. I also doubt if they have some respect for themselves.
While this is one end of the spectrum, at the other end are those working women who make a big fat salary for themselves, but still think that it is the duty of their husbands to take care of them. These women have a well paying job, but they save their salary for God knows what. They shop with their husband's cards and take much pride in doing so. Even grocery shopping is to be done with the husband's money. Since these are working women, they have a maid, a cook and other help at homes. All these people are paid by the husband and the woman thinks that that is how it is expected to be. And then she goes on to call herself a feminist. She's financially independent after all.
Women need to understand that feminism is about equality and not about having things done your way. If your husband is the sole earning member, then you can be an equal by running the house seamlessly. Still better, you can do more and save some of the money by smart shopping and planning. While a man is at work, the flour getting over at home should be the least of his headaches. For a housewife, the house is the office. You need to know what is present at home and what is needed and when. Be smart enough to plan ahead and not trouble the man during the last minute. Some wives even depend on their husbands to ferry them from one place to another. Like that is only supposed to be a man thing! Working women need to assist their husbands in the expenses at home. While the incomes may not always be equal, you can handle at-least a thing or two. If one takes care of the rent, the other can pay some bills. It takes two to run a house, irrespective of how many of them are earning. Women need to understand that it is not the duty of a man to look after them for the rest of their lives. It is all about co-existing and making a world of their own together. This is what feminism is all about.
Image Source
One of the most important things that women need to do is to stop glorifying their men for every small chore they do. I've seen women go bat-shit crazy on social media when their husbands make them a cup of tea or cook a random meal. Hundreds of photographs are posted and the man is celebrated like he's just won himself the next master chef title. This is not necessary at all. Do you think men do the same for every meal you cook? It is not a big deal and it doesn't matter who cooks at home as long as there is food on the table. Women need to stop portraying their men as something great when this happens. Having your husband cook a meal doesn't make you a feminist. Thinking it is not a big deal when he makes it, does.
A lot of people have to tweak their idea of feminism to get it right and for it to work. Most importantly, women.
This post is a part of the powerful series #FeministMondays on Naba's blog. On the second Monday of every month there would be a post on feminism. You can be a part of it too. Write an impactful post with the hashtag #FeministMondays and link it back to Naba's blog.
Original link
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