Whether you're having a difficult time choosing your maid of honor, or narrowing down your list of attendants, keep our bridesmaid etiquette advice in mind as you go.
When should I choose my bridesmaids?
Wait until you've nailed down the major stuff like your date, location, and number of guests.
How many people should I ask?
Regarding the numbers game, there's no requirement—just don't go overboard, think long and hard about who's most likely to be a part of your life 10 years from now.
How to pick maid of honor? How many maid of honor can I have?
The main role of the maid of honor, it's not just an honorary position, but one that requires planning prowess and attention to detail.
She serves as your right-hand woman and to coordinate with the bridesmaids. This is the necessary talents of maid of honor.
So if you have more than one choice, choose it with these talents.
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Or if your sisters share those talents equally, give them all the title and let them divvy up the responsibilities among themselves:
One can throw the bridal shower and another the bachelorette bash, and the third can handle the day-of duties,
such as holding your bouquet during the vows.
However, if you fear they could have vastly different ideas about planning a party, it's best for all if you bite the bullet and select just one.
Minimize hurt feelings by choosing the sibling closest to you in age. Or do it in the most diplomatic way possible: Pull a name out of a hat.
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Am I must to have someone as bridesmaid, just because I was hers?
Wedding parties aren't reciprocal situations, you're not required to have anyone as your attendant just because you were one of hers.
For example, if you were a bridesmaid in your sister-in-law wedding, but you don't want her in yours,
then you don't have to ask your sister-in-law to stand up with you, but remember that this is someone you'll see at holidays for the rest of your life,
so it might be wise to have her. After all, your wedding is one important day, but family is forever.
Do I have to ask my fiancé's sister to be a bridesmaid?
You don't have to ask her, but for the sake of family harmony it's best to make every effort to include the groom's sibling.
If the sibling strongly and vocally disapproves of your union, you may, without guilt, leave her out.
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How to tell a friend she won't be in my wedding party when I was in hers?
To be fair, give her a heads-up as soon as possible. Warmly express regret, and tell her the decision was hard to make.
You can also find something else for her to do at your ceremony, or invite her to spend time with you on the morning of the big day, and emphasize how glad you are that she'll be there.
Do the number of bridesmaids and groomsmen have to match?
Absolutely not.
People who standing up with you is meaningful and important to you. You don't need to leave or add someone you are not close with.
Just appoint a traffic cop to make sure everyone knows when, where, and with whom they're supposed to enter.
What Info do bridesmaids need to know before they say yes?
Let them know the date, a locale, and a level of formality for your wedding.
Give them an estimate on total costs (for dresses, hairstyling, travel, etc.).
You should also allow at least six months for buying dresses and banking both cash and vacation days for the event.
Make sure your bridesmaids know that they can always come to you if the burden gets to be too much.
What should bridesmaid pay for?
In addition to gifts, bridesmaids may need to contribute to the shower and help with the bachelor or bachelorette party,
not to mention their own attire, transportation, and perhaps hotel rooms.
Many etiquette experts dictates that the couple provide their attendants' lodgings.
you should think about how your decisions will affect your bridal party.
At the very least, make their financial obligations clear as soon as possible and try to make choices that don't place too much burden on them.
What events are mandatory for the bridesmaid to attend?
The only ones they should be required to attend are those directly connected to the wedding itself:
The rehearsal, rehearsal dinner (if at all possible, also invite their spouses, fiancés, or live-in life partners), and any prewedding hair-and-makeup sessions.
Can I ask my bridesmaids to help me on some DIY wedding projects?
Of course you can.
But keep in mind that assembling favors or creating room decorations isn't actually in the job description for a bridesmaid.
However, it is often part of the job description of a good friend or close relative. Bridesmaids have duties, but good friends help each other, no strings attached.
Can I dictate my bridesmaids to look uniform?
Generally, when it comes to the bridesmaids look, whatever you say goes.
But think hard before you begin to lay down rules on bridesmaid dresses, shoes and accessories.
Besides the dress, you can ask your bridesmaids to coordinate their ensembles with other matching accessories as long as you choose some basic pieces that aren't too expensive.
Who pay for the bridesmaids' hair and makeup?
t's fair to ask a bridesmaid to wear her hair or makeup in a slightly fancier style than normal.
Keep in mind that if you insist that your bridesmaids turn to a pro to achieve these goals,
or require her to use makeup she doesn't already own, you need to foot the bill, unless she offers.
How do I handle a less-than-enthused maid of honor?
You could "fire" her, but it'll likely end your friendship, so try talking to her first.
You could say, "I don't want to force you to do anything that makes you unhappy.
Another option is to let her step down of her own accord.
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